Community Model in the Fight Against Fat - Making simple, positive nutrition changes

My name is Jenny (I am the little sister of the creator of this blog) and I currently work as a Pediatric Nurse Practitioner in Georgia. I have been in practice since 2006 and have observed the effects of obesity on the lives of young children across the country. As with many medical professionals, I share a great passion for childhood obesity and am very active in the prevention. I hope that I can give some helpful isnight and tips through these blogs and my many experiences I have on a day to day basis dealing with parents and children.

As we all know, obesity has become an epidemic. 1/3 of all children are overweight! Many households, school systems and even states are taking a stand and trying their best in attempts to fight back. I have been most impressed by recent attmepts in my home state, Maine, with their 5-2-1-0 program. This simple model preaches the key elements to living healthy. : 5 fruits and vegetables a day - less than 2 hours of videogames/computer/tv - 1 hour of exercise - and 0 sugar sweetened drinks (chocolate/strawberry milk/, Kool Aid, sports drinks, energy drinks, even most fruit juices). 5-2-1-0 make this become your new mantra.

It is not only families battling weight issues who can benefit from making positive changes when it comes to food choices, because everyone's brain, organs, and body needs healthy food in order to thrive.  Every family should take a look their daily diet and decide where they can replace poor nutrition habits with good nutrition habits.

So now the question is, how do we make the change? Every day at my practice parents and children acknowledge their dietary problems and can even tell me the solution, but they just can't make the change. My answer, start small and be realistic. Baby steps will get you much further than leaps and bounds in the end. Make one goal, for example eating more fruits and vegetables (fruit cups, canned fruit and fruit snacks don't count). A good way to incorporate more fruits and veggies into your diet is by making all of your snack choices be a fruit or a veg or by just adding them to all of your favorite snacks and meals. What you'll find is that once you incorporate more fruits and veggies into your diet, you will automatically, without thinking, be cutting down on all of the sugar and starch filled items such as chips, candy, cookies, breads etc.


Some of my Favorite Examples of Easy Food Switchovers:


What we Love to eat (that's bad for us) and What we should eat (and will learn to love) instead:

* Bowl of Fruit Loops (or other sugary cereal) - instead try Honey Nut Cheerios or oatmeal with sliced berries or bananas

* Ice cream - instead eat yogurt and/or cottage cheese with berries

* Chips/crackers - instead eat Celery/Carrott sticks with PB, low fat cheese, or light dressing

* Cake/cookies - instead try Organic or Sugar-free pudding with berries

* Spaghetti with meatballs - try Whole wheat pasta with spinach and/or broccoli, peppers, and ground white meat of chicken/turk mixed in to the sauce (p.s. the smaller you cut up the veggies, the less the kids notice they are there; even try pureeing the veggies in a blender or food processor and then adding them to the tomato sauce)

* Bake potato with butter and cheese - instead eat a sweet potato, or just a salad

* Chicken nuggets -  instead eat Morning star or Applegate Famrs meatless nuggets or make your own baked chicken fingers by cutting up strips of raw chicken, dipping them in flour, then egg whites, then Panko or low fat bread crumbs, bake on 350 for 20 min (flipping sides after 10 min), or until they are fully cooked; they freeze and reheat well too.

* French fries or tater tots - if you must eat french fries, buy frozen natural potato wedges and bake them (do NOT fry), or make your own baked fries out of sweet potatoes

* Lunchables (which are deceiving because they appear nutritious, but really are packed with chemicals and preservatives, sodium, fat, and sugar that children don't need) - instead pack a homemade lunch of a deli meat sandwich on wholewheat bread, carrot sticks, pretzels, and a cup of applesauce.  If your kids love the crackers, cheese, and meat Lunchables, then pack your own crackers, cut up cheese, and cubes of fresh deli meat.

* White bread - instead buy whole wheat bread; whole wheat is actually sweeter than white bread, is packed with nutrients and has less refined sugar and carbs than white bread (that means less weight that's added to the tummy)

Fruits & Veggies 
Fruits and vegetables are not just an important part of a balanced diet - they are essential!!  Our bodies require the vitamins and minerals found in fruits and vegetables EVERY DAY in order to grow, support healthy organ function, stay alert, and to prevent disease and illness.  Our bodies cannot maintain a healthy state living only on processed foods (that's all those foods in boxes and bags).  5 servings of fruits and vegetables should be a part of meals and snacks every day - and fruit flavored food and drinks do not count as a source of fruit either.  Fresh fruit and vegetables have much higher amounts of nutrients than those that come from a can.  If fresh produce is not available, then frozen is better than canned.  Serving sizes for children are obviously smaller than an adult: a few cooked baby carrot sticks, half an apple cut into thin slices, or 1/4 cup of broccoli is a serving size for a child.  When you think about it that way and serve at least 1 fruit or veggie at every meal and snack, you'll be getting in 5 servings easily.  And replacing desserts with fresh fruit, even fruit topped with a dab of whipped cream, cuts down on a whole lot of added sugar without giving up the sweetness.  Now, what to do about all that juice that kids drink....


No Juice! What do I give my child now? Water!!!! I really believe that water and milk are really all you need. After the age of 1 it is recommend that toddlers consume 16-24 oz of 2% and whole milk daily to help their developing brains and bones. I encourage parents to introduce water in a sippy cup as early as 6 months. At 6 months they are not consuming water as a means of hydration, but just playing with the sippy cup and getting the hang of it. By 9 months, I hope that children will have started to master the use of the sippy cup, or a cup with a lid and a straw, and are drinking water with each meal. Children will of course continue to obtain a larger portion of calories and fat from breastmilk and formula in between their meals. After the age of 1, it is recommended that toddlers consume 16-24 oz of 2% or whole milk in order to help their developing brains and bones. Just because they are 1 does not now mean they need juice. Fruit juice is not a substitute for eating fruits because you miss out on the natural fibers in the fruit and are usually consuming mass amounts of additional added sugars. Most importantly, if your child is drinking juice then they likely are no longer going to want to drink water.

Problem: "My child refuses to drink water." Simple solution - slowly thin the juice with water over many days to weeks. Kids are smart, they will pick up on it if you do this too quickly. For the really stubborn bigger kids, Crystal Light and Organic variations are also good options instead of juice and soda. I also can't stress enough the importance of discontinuing the use of sports drinks. A well trained marathon runner does not even need to rehydrate with Gatorade. The only necessary time for rehydration with a sports drink would be within 30 min to 1 hour after strenuous exercise for teenaged kids. I recommend cutting the sports drink in half with water. And NO soda!  Truly, the amount of sugar in one can or 16 oz bottle of soda is all the added sugar one adult needs per day!  The sugar, chemicals, and carbonation in the soda contribute to obesity, poor health, low energy (after the sugar crash of course), and poor bone growth/bone density.

Problem: "My child would rather drink juice/milk than eat." It is easy to fill up on fluids before a meal. Either do not allow your child anything to drink, other than water, until they have consumed 1/2 of their meal/snack, or offer only water with their meal and offer milk during snack times instead.

Strategies for Starting Good Eating Habits in Kids


Make it a family change: The best way to eating and living a healthy lifestyle is keeping it simple, manageble and family centered. Changing eating habits is not just for kids.  Parents - you are your children's role model...your children are a product of their environment, therefore you have to make the changes for yourself before you can make them for your child.

Get the kids involved:  Take your children grocery shopping and involve them in the process.  It's a great way to teach them about new foods, to compare nutrition information labels, and to get them to try new things.  Involve your children in planning weekly meals and even cooking.  When children take part in cooking, they are more apt to try eating what they have made.  Check out a previous post on cooking with your child.


Eat together: Sit down and have a family meal. Research has shown that there are major benefits to having at least one family meal a day. It's a great time to talk, laugh, enjoy each other's company, and to enjoy the food.  Remember to turn the TV off though; it's hard to really pay attention to each other when there is other entertainment on.  A family meal should be a time when everyone ignores the technology that disconnects us from each other during the rest of the day; so turn off the phones and the computer too and if you need a little help getting the conversation going, you can always play a game!  My favorite meal time games are Two Truths and a Lie and an old drinking game turned dinner game, Never Have I Ever.  In Two Truths and a Lie your children must tell you three things that happened during their day, two must be truths and one a lie; it is up to everyone else to figure out which is the lie.  In Never Have I Ever, everyone takes turns stating something that they have never eaten or done and anyone else who has takes a bite of their food; for example: Never have I ever eaten brussel sprouts or never have I ever colored a picture with my toes.

The important take home message here is to make eating habit changes to include more fresh food in your family's diet, taking out added fat and sugar, in order to improve weight, health, attention, life, and self image.  Make the changes together and find sources of support to make the changes permanent.  Your kids rely on you to give them the tools to have the healthiest life possible, since they don't yet have the knowledge or ability to do it themselves.  They learn from you and your actions, so the changes must start with you!  


Helpful Resources:
* ilunchbox.com - Child portion sizes and other important nutrition information
* Food Guide Pyramid - info on how many servings of each food group a child or an adult should have
* Kid's Health.org - great information on health, nutrition, exercise, feelings, illnesses, etc with specific pages for parents, kids, and teens

Try and Try Again - Why children repeat the same motor skill over and over (and over)

Have you ever watched your child do the same activity over and over again and thought, 'what is he doing'? Up and down the stairs, up and down the stairs, again and again.  You think, 'ok, enough already, let's do something else.' On the playground has your daughter insisted on playing on the same piece of equipment for 10 minutes, even though you are ready to see her do something else?  And every parent has heard the dreaded, 'read it again!' as their child begs for their favorite book to be read for the hundredth time.  As annoying as it is to parents to witness or even have to participate in these repetitive actions of their children (especially toddlers), there is a developmental explanation for why they behave this way; and don't worry, it's actually a good thing.

In the Beginning
Babies truly are born a blank slate.  They come hard wired with protective reflexes, but they have to learn how to do every action from scanning a room to look for mom to running and skipping.  These skills do not develop without the opportunities to try; which is why tummy time is so important from very early on!   As babies build strength in their neck, torso, arms, and legs they are able to move around, slowly increasing their movement skills as they get older.  But babies hardly ever experience beginners luck; their skill acquisition comes through experimentation and hard work.  Take crawling for example, as a baby gains strength and balance, she challenges her abilities to get on her hands and knees, then lunge forward.  She will collapse the first few times she tries; she may even give up for a couple of days, but as she revisits this new motor skill and tries over and over she will start to get the hang of it.  Then one day, you look up to notice she is crawling across the floor, headed for her toys.  She continues to perfect her crawling abilities, a nd so begins the transition to the next motor milestone of pulling up to stand.  You will see this same pattern of experimenting with new abilities and the repitition with practicing until a baby has mastered a new skill.

The Drive to Master
The inner drive to master a new skill is an innate quality that everyone is born with.  Toddlers are the perfect example as they are constantly engrossed in figuring out how to do one thing or another on their own.  I'm sure you've heard "me do it!!" on a daily basis if you have or have had a two year old. Coupled with a new realization that they exist apart from mom, this drive to master new skills makes toddlers fiercely independent.  This new independence also brings out brand new behaviors and therefore a whole new bag of tricks needed to deal with these behaviors.  See the previous post on handling toddler behavior for help.  The drive to master new skills is actually a really important developmental trait, as it motivates young children to keep trying in order to get better at something.  At an age where every skill is a building block to new and more complex skills, this "try and try again" attitude is essential. 

The 'Just-Right Fit'
Because of this drive to master new skills and challenges in their environment (i.e toys, games, sports, playground equipment, etc) children young and old are motivated to stick with trying a new activity until they figure it out, but only if the level of challenge is just right.  It can't be too hard or too easy.  If the new activity is too difficulty and they do not have any small successes as they adjust their approach, then they will give up.  If an activity is too easy, they will do it quickly and skillfully and then move on to find something else with a little more challenge.  This is why babies don't play with Legos and older kids don't play with stacking rings.  If you find your child trying to do an activity or play with a toy that is age appropriate, but she is getting frustrated and defeated, then step in and provide small amount of assistance that allow your child to complete the activity successfully, but with as little help as possible.  Sometimes even modeling how to do it a couple of times can be helpful.  Then the next time she tries it, provide even less help.  With each repeated effort she will improve her skills and knowledge to be able to do it on her own.  Prodiving the smallest amount of assistance necessary to help a child do an activity that is just outside of their abilities to do independently is called 'scaffolding;' this strategy helps them learn how to do an activity or skill independently.  This theory also applies to other areas of learning.
When a child finds an activity or skill that is within this 'just right fit' range they will repeatedly try until they finally master it.  When an activity that has required scaffolding finally starts to fall within the 'just right fit' category a child will begin to work harder to get it right on their own.  This drive causes children to engage in the same activity over and over again until they are finally successful, then the success is fun for a while until they need another new challenge.

Bottom Line: In order to learn new skills and to become more independent children need to repeat activities over and over until they master them.  Ever time they make a new attempt their brain and body are making small adjustments to improve their abilities and therefore their success.  It is entirely normal and necessary for kids to do things over and over until they feel successful.  Interrupting these attempts at mastery can backfire and decrease a child's confidence in their own skills.  Reading books over and over is also important as with each repitition a child is making new connections, learning more about language and reading, and taking in new knowledge.  When your child can actually recite a favorite book or finish the sentences, you will understand how powerful reading books over and over can be.  So let your kids try and try and then try and try some more, encouraging them and offering assistance only when needed. 
And the disclaimer here is that you should obviously discourage your child from trying to engage in any activity or behavior that is harmful or developmentally inappropriate.

When Repetitive Behaviors Are Not Normal
Some types of repetitive behaviors are not normal and can be a sign of an Autism Spectrum Disorder or other disorder, such as OCD or even a severe sensory processing disorder. Repetitive behaviors that seem to have no purspose and happen on a daily basis for long durations, such as open/closing cupboards without getting into what's inside, lining objects up into straight lines or categories, or wandering without a destination goal are all examples of behaviors that are not developmentally appropriate and serve no purpose in acquiring new skills or knowledge. Repetitive behaviors that appear to be for sensory purposes, such as hand flapping, head banging, rocking, and pushing or crashing into objects and people can be indications of a developmental disorder, especially if they occur along with other non-purposeful repetitive behaviors, such as the ones previously described. If you have any concerns about your child, it is important to speak to your pediatrician without waiting too long. For children with a developmental disorder, such as Autism, early intervention is crucial and makes a huge difference in the potential progress of that child.

Easter Activities!

Happy Easter (or Happy Spring if you're not celebrating Easter)!  Any holiday is a great excuse to do some fun activities that are out of the everyday norm.  And these activities are not only fun, but also actually work on lots of developmental skills.  Some of them might even be family traditions that you already do and didn't even know were secretly good for your kids development!

Easter Egg Hunt
Did you know that easter egg hunts are great for working on so many developmental skills? To name a few: visual scanning and other visual/perceptual skills, reasoning skills, and some gross motor skills, like running. 
- If you want to up the challenge for your kids, hide the eggs in some hard to reach places to work on other gross motor skills, like climbing and balance.  Also, opening up the eggs and putting the two halves back together works on bilateral coordination (using the two sides of the body together) - a very important skill.
- To add an academic challenge, label the eggs with a letter on each that spell a word when put together correctly; if using multiple colors, have a word for each color and if you have more than 1 kid searching for eggs they will have to work together to combine their eggs to spell the words.  For younger children label eggs with letters or shapes to work on those early learning concepts (craft stores have fun foam stickers in letters, numbers, and shapes which would be fun to put on the eggs). 
- To cut down on sugar overload, fill eggs with non-candy items like, coins (then have older kids do some math with the money they collect), stickers, fortunes, silly bands, etc.
- To increase the cognitive challenge for older kids, turn the egg hunt into a scavenger hunt with clues in each egg leading to the easter basket at the end.
- If you have adolescents who are "too old" for an easter egg hunt, include them in the task of setting up a hunt for younger kids in the family or the neighborhood.

Easter Relay Race
Get the whole family involved in an easter themed relay race!  Each family member performs actions like, bunny hop, skip, hop backwards, or walk like a duck from point A to point B to see which team wins. Doing these actions works on motor planning, gross motor skills, coordination, and all the movement is good for kids too!  Plus, it's really fun, especially if you have a lot of family members involved - including the adults!

Decorating Eggs
However you want to do it, decorating easter eggs is a great opportunity to work on fine motor skills, creativity, sequencing and planning.  For some boys (and even girls) who are typically "too fast" and "too rough" with their movements, handling a delicate egg is a good way to help slow them down and work on being gentle with their movements.  But make sure to give these types of kids lots of preparation ahead of time on being slow and gentle, lots of cues during the activity if you notice them ramping up, and lots of praise for doing well throughout the task.

Outside Toys and Games
Easter is a great time to start pulling out the outside toys and games (or give new ones in the easter basket) because nice spring weather is usually ramping up and it's a great time to be outside.  Sidewalk chalk, jump ropes, kickballs, bubbles, velcro toss and catch, kites, etc. are examples of inexpensive outside toys that can be found anywhere from local drug stores to Target to amazon.com.  So, bring some toys out in the backyard, play with them for a while, then sit back with your significant other and enjoy a nice adult drink while you smile at your children playing in the yard on a beautiful spring afternoon, knowing that they are having fun, doing great things for their little brains and bodies, and going to sleep well that night!

Easter Dinner Helpers
Involve your children in helping to prepare for easter dinner by cooking with you (see the earlier post Little Chef for tips on how to include children in cooking), setting the table, playing waitress/waiter with appetizer trays, and making decorations for the dinner table.  All of these activities work on a variety of skills and are fun for kids to do!

Grow Your Easter Decorations
If planting some spring flowers to use as decorations this Easter sounds appealing to you, then involve your children.  Picking out the flowers and materials together at the store gives them some ownership of the activity, increases motivation to stay involved, and makes them feel proud of the final product.   Helping to carry the materials works on muscle strength and endurance.  Following instructions step by step works on sequencing and planning.  Getting their hands in the soil is a great sensory experience.  Manipulating the tools and plants also works on fine motor skills.  And the end products are beautiful spring flowers in pots or your garden to celebrate the holiday.

These are just a sampling of activities to do with your family!  I'm sure your kids can come up with even more ideas if you ask them!  Now, get outside and have fun!

The Art of Playing Independently

On a daily basis I'm sure all parents can be heard telling their children to go play with their toys.  But how many children actually oblige and happily entertain themselves with their toys, puzzles, books, coloring....?  The answer should be ALL, but sadly it's not.  A great majority of children today do not know how to play by themselves.  It can be blamed on any number of things, but watching too much TV, especially from a young age, is right up there at the top of the list with inhibiting a child's ability to play independently.

As a parent, you may experience that your requests for your children to go play are met with whining, tantrums, and begging for TV or other entertainment.  Children respond with "I don't like my toys," "there's nothing to play with," "it's boring, " "I don't know what to do."  And as busy parents trying to deal with meal preparation, household chores, emailing, facebooking and surfing the internet, we give in to the resistance too easily and turn the TV on to stop the whining.  We all do it, but there are good reasons for making sure that as parents we take an active role in helping our children learn to play independently instead of taking the easy way out and letting the TV do the entertaining. 
**Play is important because it helps to develop fine motor and gross motor skills, it reinforces learning and develops cognitive skills, and it promotes problem solving and creativity, as well as social and emotional growth.  Independent play encourages a child to be imaginative and helps to increase self-confidence as children have opportunities to be successful on their own. Read the bottom of the post for some facts on why play is important and how the ability to play independently is negatively impacted by too much television.

How do you define independent play?  Your expectation of your child's ability to play on their own certainly affects how successful you consider your child to be in this skill.  Independent play (or solitary play) is when a child engages in play with toys on their own.  I consider a child playing on their own with toys that have been set up by an adult to be independent play as well, as most young children have difficulty accessing, moving, or setting up certain toys that they are capable of playing with.  In many cases of successful independent play, parents do need to get the toys out for their young child or show them how to play with it first before their child can play on their own.  If your idea of independent play is that your 24 month old go to his room, pick out toys and play without any direction or assistance from you, that may not be realistic; but helping him choose toys to play with, getting him set up to play with them, and then telling him you have to fold laundry for a little while (or whatever else you need to do) may be the key to setting him up for success.  By the time a child is at least 4 years old (younger in some cases), I would expect that they could be independent in choosing, getting out, and starting to play with most age appropriate toys that they have easy access to in the house (minus craft activities and complicated toys/games).
Also, when my kids play together without needing me, I consider this independent play as well.  And - when my kids are playing independently they will often ask me questions, ask for help with something, or need me to mediate a sibling disagreement and then go right back to playing on their own - to me this is fine and still successful independent play.
Watching TV is NOT  independent play!

Realistic Expectations: The average 2 year old should be able to play on his/her own for at least 15 minutes at a time and do this several times a day.  As a child's age increases, so should the amount of time spent in independent play; for example, my 3 1/2 year old daughter can play uninterrupted for 45 min (although during that time she may ask me a question or want to show me something).  Prior to 2 years of age, the time spent playing with toys independently varies and of course involves more adult supervision than older children.  But a child around 18 months can feasibly play on their own for at least 10 minutes while a parent is busy doing something close by.

What disrupts being able to play indpendently:
* Watching TV!  TV does all the thinking for those watching, so when an avid TV-watching child is expected to think creatively on their own, that skill just isn't there, but the desire to be entertained is!  These kids just don't know how to play with toys the way that kids who watch TV infrequently do.
* Missing play skills. Kids, especially young ones, often need instruction on how to play with their toys that are new or difficult.  Play with the toys with your child first before expecting him/her to play with them without you.
* Toys are inaccessible. Make sure that your kids can get to their toys easily, or at least the ones that you want them to get to. 
* Toys are not age appropriate.  When toys are too difficult to play with or too easy kids won't have enough interest to stay engaged with them.  Before expecting your child to play independently, make sure the toys they have access to are appropriate for them to play with and on their skill level.  They will need supervision and assistance toplay with toys that are above their skill level.  Some children with advanced skill levels need toys that are beyond their age limit to keep them challenged enough to be interested.  It's all about finding that "just right" fit when it comes to toys - challenging enough to be motivating to master and not so hard that they can't do it on their own.
* Separation anxiety. Very young children going through separation anxiety and may have a hard time playing on their own.  Young children who spend a lot of time in daycare may also not want to play without mom and dad when they are home.  Starting off playing with your child and then removing yourself to do something else nearby can help to ease your child into playing independently.
* Siblings. Don't be discouraged if your kids have a hard time playing together or side by side without it eventually turning into a battle.  Set clear guidelines for how to play together, consequences for not following those rules, and then be consistent with it.  For example, if my 2 year old hits his sister, he gets a time out; if they are fighting over a toy, even after a warning from me, they lose the toy for a while and have to find something else to play with; I have intervened and given them the tools to resolve conflicts so many times that every once in a while I will say to my 3.5 and 2 year olds to "work it out themselves" (mostly because I've reached the end of my patience with helping them) and incredibly enough, sometimes it actually works!
Playing together is a great opportunity for working on social skills, turn taking, and conflict resolution, even with toddlers.  It can be exhausting, but just remember that they are internalizing everything (even if it doesn't seem like it), so make everything you do and say to them count if you want to see positive results in the future!
* A disability. Children with developmental disabilities that involve delayed skills, problems with attention and focus, or require more supervision may have more difficulty engaging in independent play.  That doesn't mean that as a parent you have the green light to keep the TV on.  Instead, look for strategies to help your child play more indpendently.  Offer toys that are on your child's developmental level and not their age level. Choose activities that play to your child's strengths, not weaknesses, when you want him or her to play independently.  For example, if your child has difficulty with gross motor skills and coordination, but is excellent at fine motor and visual perceptual skills, then get out the puzzles and legos instead of sending him out to play on the swing set.  Also, start by playing with your child and once they are having success, leave briefly (even if it's in the same room and you "appear" to be busy) and come back right before they begin to get discouraged or upset.  Engage in play with your child again, then leave for longer the next time.  Continue this pattern of playing and leaving, gradually increasing the amount of time away from your child until they feel more confident playing alone.  This does not just happen in one play session; use this method every time you play together and over time you will see progress.
If your child struggles with attention and focus, let them be in control of choosing activities as they will be more motivated to do them that way.  However, if your child spends a lot of time on the computer or watching TV, limit this (as it increases poor attention skills) and instead guide your child to choosing non-technology based toys; even provide a few options to choose from if need be.  Activities that are well matched to their ability level can help increase time spent attending to the activity, and especially if there is a motivating end result to the activity, such as making an end product, winning a game, finishing a puzzle, etc. Set up play in a location that has limited distractions (no TV, music, extra people, etc).  Even provide a visual timer and explain that they must play on their own until the timer goes off.

Remember that it's important to give kids opportunities to learn how to play creatively and independently every day because it really is a skill that needs to be developed!

Disclaimer: I know it goes without saying, but I just need to reiterate that independent play does not mean that children play unsupervised!  Even if your child is playing independently in the next room, checking in on her occasionally is a good idea; and babies and toddlers should not be left alone.
Facts to Support the Importance of Independent and Creative Play:
* Creative play, free of all types of media entertainment, promote developmental skills, cognitive skills, social and emotional growth, and creativity. The TV actually hinders all of those things, preventing our children from developing any of those necessary skills. TV does all of the thinking for children; they are just passive observers, which inhibits their ability to initiate play on their own because they are used to being entertained.

* Playing independently improves attention span, whereas TV contributes to a decreased attention span. "Each hour of TV watched daily between the ages of 0 and 7 years equated to a 10% chance of attention problems by age seven years (Christakis D 2004)."

* Viewing TV and playing video games each are associated with increased subsequent attention problems in childhood (Swing, 2010).

* Exposure to “green space” results in a significant reduction in ADHD, in both areas of impulse control and attention ability. Nature not only has attention restorative benefits, but also activates all the senses to enhance multi-sensory learning ability (Faber-Taylor A 2001, Kuo F 2004).

*"Overuse of TV and video games may result in children lacking essential connection with themselves, others and nature. Children now fear nature, limiting outdoor play which is essential for achieving sensory and motor development (Louv R 2005)."

* Playing with other children and role playing with dolls or other toys is essential for social and emotional development. "The ability of the 21st century child to socialize with both adults and peers is deteriorating at a rapid pace. Sally Ward, a professor of speech and language pathology reported in her book “Baby Talk “ that one in five toddlers demonstrate speech and language delays (Ward S 2004)."

Cited articles are from the Fact Sheet by Cris Rowan, http://www.zonein.ca/index.html.

Weekend Activity with an Egg Carton

Wait! Don't recycle that egg carton just yet!  That cardboard container has endless possibilities to challenge your child's developmental skills and creativity, no matter how old they are.  And participating in any of these activities gets the mind and body moving without using TV, video games, or the computer. Read on for activity suggestions and a summary of the developmental skills they work on.

Painting - Use the egg carton as a palette to separate paint colors.  Or paint the whole carton itself.  Painting it turns it from an old egg carton into a treasure box or a jewelry box.  Painting works on fine motor skills, coordination, motor planning, creativity, and it is a great sensory experience.  And a toddler up to an adolescent could enjoy this activity based on their own skill level; obviously the younger the child, the more supervision and assistance they need.

Sorting box - Turn the egg carton into a place to sort objects (like buttons, or small toys by size, color, texture, or any other characteristic.  This is a great activity for toddlers and preschoolers to work on fine motor skills, cognitive skills, and academic concepts.  Older kids can sort coins to work on money and math concepts. Note: Do not give babies choking hazards and supervise toddlers with small objects!

Goggles - Add some "super goggles" to the dress up wardrobe! Cut out two of the egg "cups" so you have two individual ones.  Poke a hole in the bottom of each cup, use pipe cleaners or other objects to connect the two cups and make a band to go around the head or behind the ears to hold the goggles up.  Voila - fun goggles to add to dress up costumes!  The work that goes into making these goggles works on fine motor skills, sequencing, motor planning, and creativity, especially if your child paints or decorates the goggles before wearing.

Math games - Use a 12 or 18 count container to work on basic math concepts.  1. One example is labeling each egg "cup" with a number.  Give your preschool or early elementary age child a pile of small objects (beans, dried pasta, buttons...) and have your child count out the correct number of objects for the corresponding number in each cup.  To increase the challenge to work on number recognition and reading, cut up small pieces of paper that are labeled with numbers or number words.  Have your child choose pieces of paper, count out the correct number of objects, and place them in the corresponding "cup" of the carton.  There are many variations of this game based on a child's skill level.
2. Another example for working on basic addition and subtraction, is to place a cotton ball or small pom pom in each cup of the carton and add or subtract based on simple math equations on a card, using the "math carton" to solve the problem.  For example: 4 + 2 =   Place 4 cotton balls, 1 in each of 4 cups of the carton, then add 2 more and count the total.  Reverse the process for subtraction problems.
This obviously works on academic concepts and cognitive skills.  Adding in tongs, chopsticks, or spoons to move the objects increases the challenge for improving fine motor skills.

Musical instruments - Cut out egg cups in sets of two (keeping them attached).  Fill them with rice, beans, dried pasta, coins, etc., fold and tape around the edges to keep the contents inside.  Decorate with paint, markers, stickers, or glitter to make them fancy.  Turn on some music and incorporate your new shakers into a dance!
Separate the top of the container from the bottom, wrap a bunch of elastic bands around the top and you have yourself a little guitar.  Now get the shakers and guitar and you've got the makings of a cardboard band! This works on fine motor skills, motor planning (especially if you get your kids trying to make up or copy dance moves), coordination, movement, and creativity.

Planting - Use an egg carton to start a mini planting experiment.  Fill the cups with potting soil, plant a see in each, and water.  Keep the carton outside so that the water can drain and get some sun.  When the seeds start to germinate and require more growing space, transfer the seedlings to larger pots or your garden.  This activity is a great sensory experience, good for working on motor skills, coordination, sequencing, and cognitive skills.  For older kids, academic concepts can be added in like, keeping an observation journal, writing and/or drawing pictures to describe the process of planting and plant growth, measuring the plant growth with a ruler and graphing it, etc.

Make some Easter eggs - If your egg carton is still full of eggs and you want to make a few easter decorations, use the eggs and carton to make easter eggs.  Fill the cups with glue, glitter, dye, and other materials to dip the eggs into to decorate them.  Cut out empty cups to display individual eggs as decorations.

These are just some examples of activities to do with an empty egg carton.  If given the opportunity and support, I'm sure your kids can come up with even more creative things to turn the egg cartons into.  And just think of all the fun things other unused items in your house are waiting to turn in to! If you have a baby (about 9 months and up), just give him or her the empty carton and let the exploration begin.  Add in some pots and pans, measuring cups and spoons, and spatulas for a little more fun!
If you have a suggestion for another fun activity, post it below in the comments to share with other parents!

Parenting Tip: Handling Toddler Behavior Problems

Parenting Tip of the Day: When dealing with undesirable behavior from your toddler, keep your cool and rely on your two best friends: Distraction and Redirection. DISTRACTION to stop the behavior from going farther and REDIRECTION to get your child to do a different desirable behavior that they are motivated to do. Don't even attempt negotiating with a toddler or trying to make them do anything by asking or telling, they're just not old enough for those behavior strategies yet.


Here's a recent scenario from my house: My 24 month old son threw his lunch plate on the floor, a common occurrence, and after firmly reminding him that we do not throw plates (as if he was actually listening to that) I asked him to pick it up. He told me "no," which was my cue to use distraction and redirection. In this case the distraction was that I nicely got him down from his chair and with a completely different (positive) tone, I excitedly suggested that "we" put the plate in the dishwasher (something he likes to do), which was the redirection to more appropriate behavior. He immediately changed his attitude from defiant to happy and compliant. He put the plate in the dishwasher by himself, I praised him, he was proud of himself, and we moved on to playing with toys. Will he throw his plate again? Of course. This is a stage he will get over eventually. What I did here was to stop a bad behavior, manipulate the situation to get a good behavior while still allowing him to feel independent, and keep my sanity by avoiding a silly battle with a 2 year old.

Teaching good behavior is much more effective when it's done positively and done using age appropriate strategies. As a parent, it's hard to not lose it sometimes, but taking a second to take a breath and rethink your strategy before reacting negatively can make a huge difference in the response you get from your young child.

The Little Chef - Cooking with your child

The thought of letting your child be your sous chef in the kitchen may cause you to shudder, but it's less of a  big deal than you think.  Actually, it can really be quite fun, for you and your child.  It just takes setting up the right situation and having the patience to move a little slower and get a little messier. 
Not convinced yet?  Read on. And if you are all-for cooking with your child or better yet, already do, keep reading to find out all the benefits this fun activity actually has for your child.

The joy of including children in cooking is more about the process than the finished product, so adjusting your expectations a little can make it a more successful experience for your child and for you.  It often takes a little release of control (on your part) and allowing for some margin of error.  For example, take making cookies from a mix with a 4 year old.  If you allow him the opportunity to really participate (not just watch you, because let's face it, that's just no fun for him), then you might end up with a few egg shell shards in the mix and part of the batter on the counter.  That's ok.  Repeat that to yourself if you need to; "That's OK!"  Just take a look at him as he cracks his first egg and feels the squishy yolk, stirs the batter cautiously at first and then with increased speed and control, slightly improves his pouring abilities within the span of making a batch of cookies, and marvels at his finished product.  Think of what you have helped him to gain in those few minutes: confidence in succeeding at something new, better pouring skills, a little increased strength from all that stirring, new respect for you for letting him cook, and some quality time with you.  Isn't that worth a few egg shells in the cookies and a little batter on the counter that will take you an extra 30 seconds to clean up?

Here's where letting your kids help cook actually works in your favor - The older the child, the more they can do, and the bigger help they actually are in the kitchen. Think about that - they can actually HELP you!  So start working on the pouring, measuring, stirring, and chopping skills when they're young so that they've got the experience to do it more independently in a few years. Can you picture your middle schooler making you breakfast in bed or your teenager cooking dinner for the family one night a week?  I'm telling you, if this sounds good to you, then start cooking with your kids now!

Cooking with a toddler can also be accomplished while avoiding a disaster in the kitchen.  Cooking with two toddlers is also possible - that's right, I said possible, not impossible .  Here's an example from my own kitchen; this actually happened this evening:  We had stir fry on the menu for dinner tonight and I included my 3 1/2 year old daughter and my son, who just turned 2, in the prep work.  I washed the vegetables myself (although my daughter could have easily helped with this), and cut only the green pepper into long, thin slices. I set each of my kids up with a cutting board, a bowl for the cut up veggies, small portions of vegetables at a time (green peppers, green beans, and mushrooms), and a crinkle cutter that they use to chop (a dull vegetable cutter; see the picture at the bottom of the post).  My daughter got right to work once I gave her instructions and a quick demo on how to chop each type of vegetable - she's been using the crinkle cutter since she was 2 and knew what to do.  My son needed some hand over hand assistance to control the crinkle cutter and the vegetable at the same time when he chopped, but I slowly let him take control until he was doing it all by himself successfully - (did I mention he just turned two, like a couple of weeks ago, and he doesn;t have any special skills; in fact, using the cutter is fairly new for him. So see, a typical toddler can help).  They chopped everything but the carrots and were incredibly proud of themselves.  Instead of cutting the veggies myself, my efforts were spent helping them do it and I think it probably took about the same amount of time, if not less since there were two of them working.  And instead of playing with their typical toys while I cooked, they practiced some new skills that will be very beneficial to them in the future. Of course my son cut the veggies in pieces that were too long or too short and he started to mess around with the scraps before I had a chance to clear them out of his way, but I expected these things to happen, so for me the whole thing was a success. Their assistance ended at the conclusion of the prep work, even though they asked to do more.  My husband finished this meal as planned, but the take home message here is that kids can be involved in any part of the making of a meal, it doesn't have to be the whole thing, especially if they are young like my kids.

Suggestions for Cooking with Kids
1. Choose age appropriate tasks - young children do well with short, simple tasks like stirring and dumping ingredients, with an adult's assistance.  As children get older and have improved coordination, allow them the opportunity to practice things like pouring, measuring, cracking eggs, etc. 
2. Keep it simple - Your child doesn't have to make the entire meal or recipe with you for it to be a successful experience.  Choose parts of the recipe or meal that your child can most easily help with or choose something simple to start with if you want your child to help with the whole thing. 
3.  Have realistic expectations - Plan on getting messy.  Plan on it taking extra time.  There's the potential that you might even have to start over, although I have yet to need to do that.  The finished product may not resemble your best work, but that's not what really matters.
4.  Have patience - Keep your child's abilities and attention span in mind when choosing tasks for them to be involved in.  But do allow them to get involved, not matter how much harder you think it's going to make cooking, you just might be surprised how much fun you have.
5.  Choose the right time - If week nights are chaotic for you and a mad dash to get dinner on the table before bed time, then choosing the weekends to cook with your kids is probably the best situation.  Allowing children to participate in cooking does not have to happen every day for them to enjoy it and learn new things, but by doing it on a somewhat regular basis provides them with the opportunity to improve their skills.
6. Use kid-friendly cooking utensils - They really do make these and sell them at stores and online.  Look for small whisks, spatulas, crinkle cutters (for kids to chop with - they have a dull edge), even a kid size apron makes them feel like the real deal (and keeps the food off the clothes).
7. Remember that cooking with kids is about teaching them and having fun. 

The Benefits for Children
The opportunities for children to participate in cooking tasks provides many benefits that affect a number of different areas of development that carry over to other things and future, more complex abilities (such as writing; interesting how cooking as a young child can have a far-reaching affect like that).
- Strength: Stirring, lifting, and carrying improves upper body strength which is needed for motor skills, such as handwriting and sports.
- Coordination and control: Dumping ingredients, chopping, stirring, cracking eggs, measuring, and pouring, etc. work on coordination skills and refining the amount of pressure or speed they use to improve control (coordination and control are important for just about everything!)
- Sequencing: Following directions in order improves sequencing abilities (not to mention memory), which is important for lots of daily tasks and also for writing and school tasks
- Reading: If your child is old enough to read, following recipes works on reading skills, comprehension, and new vocabulary; if your child is learning to read, looking for words they know or sounding out new words on ingredient containers helps to improve reading skills; and if your child is not yet a reader, looking for familiar letters or numbers on containers and learning new vocabulary is also important for future reading
- Sensory experience: Feeling the variety of textures involved with cooking is important, especially for young children who are still developing their understanding of the objects in the world around them; feeling food textures and becoming comfortable with them can also help young children and picky eaters expand their food interests
- Math and Science: Older kids can work on addition, subtraction, and fractions in real life situations, which helps to improve their retention of these skills; simple arithmetic, counting, and concepts such as more/less can be taught to younger children through cooking; and science concepts can be introduced to kids of all ages through cooking, such as temperature, how different ingredients affect the outcome of the recipe (chemistry), etc.
- Confidence: Helping, creating a final product, and learning new skills are all confidence boosters for children.  Cooking builds confidence in a postive way that watching TV or playing video games cannot.  Confidence affects many aspects of a child's life and is incredibly important as they get older and become more independent.
- Values: Spending time with family while cooking, cooperating, and enjoing the final product together or sharing it with someone else teaches and reinforces values that cannot be taught by watching TV, even if the show was about values.  Being part of the process and having good role models is what is so important.  Taking the time to cook with your kids shows them how much you love them and how much you care.


Crinkle cutter photo - the handles are small and the blades are dull; perfect for young children to use:

PLAY! Get creative with play at home

It's easy to work on developmental skills at home when you look at the toys and other items in your home in a new way!  Turn the TV off and turn some unassuming home items into a fun family activity.

Here is a video of my kids at home.  My husband, who has apparently become inadvertently affected by my profession as a pediatric OT, made up a great game with the kids and I caught it on camera so that I could share it with all of you.  He used some SquashBlox construction cushions, inflatable dinosaurs from my son's birthday party, and a musical card to create a fun activity for our kids.

They did this over and over and over again!  It was hilarious!  What my husband didn't realize was how many developmental skills this game actually worked on:
* Color recognition
* Listening skills (auditory processing)
* Coordination
* Balance
* It provided movement and proprioception/heavy work pattern (important sensory components)
* Social skills/cooperation/following instructions (my daughter had been instructed to help her brother who is still learning his colors and to make sure they both went in the same direction)

My kids also recently assisted in starting a garden in our back yard.  Being 3 1/2 and 24 months, there wasn't a whole lot they could do, but we all found lots of ways for them to be involved.  They helped to carry items to and from our barn.  They got to go for rides in the wheelbarrow.  My son climbed the bags of compost.  My daughter used a small shovel to carry top soil to the wheelbarrow.  They both dug with trowels in the dirt and pulled up weeds.  My daughter helped to pull the hose all the way to the back yard and they both took turns holding and figuring out how to work the soaker wand to water our plants.

These activities, although not typical play, worked on the following developmental skills and foundations:
* Strength
* Endurance
* Gross motor skills
* Coordination
* Exploration
* Social skills: cooperation and turn taking
* Sequencing
* New vocabulary and nature concepts
* Confidence in accomplishing new tasks

An ingenious friend of mine recently posted a picture on facebook of her son playing hopscotch in the family room using painters tape to mark out the hopscotch path.  That's a great way to use random things at home to have fun and work on developmental skills through creative play.

To come up with exciting new creative play at home, look at things around the house and think about how to turn them into fun games or activities for your kids.  Try to incorporate any of the following:
* Gross motor skills: running, jumping, skipping, twirling, climbing, somersaults......
* Fine motor skills: grasp, writing/coloring, using scissors, using tongs/chopsticks, play dough.....
* Coordination and motor planning: dancing, cartwheels, jumping rope, ball play, sports.......
* Strength and endurance: wheelbarrow walking, running, climbing, pushing/carrying weighted objects.......
* Cognitive skills: educational concepts, problem solving, new vocabulary, imagination/creativity........
* Sensory components: movement, proprioception (heavy work patterns/jumping), listening skills, visual skills, exploring textures

Unplug the TV, turn the video games off, get creative and have fun!  Share your inventive home activities in the comments!  We can all learn new ideas from each other!

Fine Motor Skills and age appropriate activities to improve skills

• I’m preparing you now – this is a long one, but with lots of good information, so if you don’t have the time (or attention span) to read the whole thing, then scan the headings for what is important to you or at least check out the activities at the bottom.

What are fine motor skills?
Fine motor skills are actions accomplished with the fingers and hands (such as cutting with scissors). They are more complicated and intricate than gross motor skills, which are large movements accomplished with larger muscle groups of parts of the body (such as kicking a ball) or even the whole body (such as running). The development of fine motor skills begins at birth when a baby grasps its parent’s finger - a reflex at first, but that movement eventually becomes controlled enough for them to open and close their hand to play with toys. The development of fine motor skills also follows a predictable sequence throughout infancy and the toddler years, each skill building upon itself to become more controlled and refined in order to accomplish more complex tasks as the child gets older. One of the major ‘building blocks’ of these fine motor skills is strength! The skills cannot be mastered correctly if there is a lack of strength in the muscles controlling the fingers and in the hands, arms, shoulders, and torso. If a certain fine motor skill in the sequence is not mastered correctly, it can have an impact on the future development of more complex fine motor skills and the activities that require the use of those skills. One very big and important example is handwriting!

The importance of fine motor skills
Yes, they really are important! Without the use of fine motor skills we wouldn’t be able to care for ourselves or others, engage in occupational activities or favorite hobbies, or even interact with our environment. Fine motor skills are required for almost every activity that we engage in on a daily basis from about the age of 6 months throughout the rest of our life. There are many activities that can be accomplished with fair to poor fine motor skills and some without hands at all, as you may have witnessed from people with amputations or injuries, but there are also many activities that require our fine motor skills to be well mastered and many school tasks and occupations that couldn’t be accomplished without them.

In the world of pediatric occupational therapy, my mother (an OT for 33 years and also co-owner of our OT clinic in Atlanta) has seen a decline in the handwriting and fine motor skills of school age children over the last decade. In most cases of poor fine motor skills (where there is not a birth defect or an obvious developmental explanation for poor fine motor skills) it is often due to a lack of strength in the upper body; the other explanation is a problem with motor planning, but that would usually also be evident in other areas of development, like gross motor skills. Ever since the AAP recommended that babies should be put to sleep on their backs and since a vast amount of contraptions to hold babies have become easily available, infants are missing out on the important developmental opportunities that sleeping on the stomach and playing on their tummies provides. A mere 10 minutes of “tummy time” a day just isn’t enough to build the necessary strength and endurance in the muscles needed for future fine motor and gross motor skills.

How does it all start in infancy?
Babies are born lacking strength in their muscles to support their own weight, which is why babies don’t particularly like tummy time at first (but they do like sleeping on their tummies because of the comfort and proximity to the thumb that it provides). Think back to when you’ve been out of shape and attempting to work out again – it’s hard right? You feel the burn almost immediately and begin to think of reasons why stopping would be a good idea. It’s the same for babies. Holding their heavy heads up against gravity with never before used little, tiny neck muscles and pushing up on their little forearms is difficult and uncomfortable and so they would prefer to stop and be cuddled. But, just like going to the gym a few times, with each session spent on the belly, every baby gains strength and over time builds enough strength to stay in and enjoy this position. (If a baby was born with low muscle tone it is even harder for them to be on their tummy and build strength – if you suspect your baby has low muscle tone, consider consulting with a pediatric occupational therapist to help your child overcome this limitation).

Being on the tummy not only builds strength in the neck, but also the back, chest, shoulders, arms, and hands (all parts of the body needed for fine motor skills). “Tummy time” is important for a great many things that affect development, which I won’t get into now, but as far as motor skills, it is the precursor to things like, rolling and crawling, and the strength built up in this position also improves a baby’s ability to bring her hands together to play with a toy, hold a bottle, clap, etc., not to mention building the strength to be able to sit up in order to bring the hands together to play. In the interest of time and space for typing, I won’t get into all the developmental details; all you have to know is that it is INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT for babies to spend LOTS OF TIME on their tummies from day 1, especially for those babies who sleep on their backs. And by this I mean, when a baby is not being held, asleep, or in the car/stroller, then he should be playing on a blanket on the floor, on a parent’s chest or lap, or even playing on his belly in the crib or pack n play. Parents can even hold their baby in their arms with the baby on her tummy (like an airplane or football hold).

The Development Continues
Providing lots of experiences to interact with toys, textures, and gross motor play as children develop is very important for the continued development of fine motor skills.  Overall upper body and arm strength is the vital foundation for fine motor skills and crawling is a very important first step.  If your child skipped crawling, then even more gross motor play that involves the arms and upper body is important, such as wheelbarrow walking and climbing.  Strength: Having adequate upper body, arm strength, and hand strength are important for stability and proper posture when engaging in fine motor activities.  With that strength and stability children are able to develop fine motor skills naturally and along a predictable sequence. 
Grasp: Typically the progression of grasp goes from raking up small items with the whole hand into the palm to picking up small items with the finger tips and then to picking items up with a tripod grasp (two fingers and thumb; also the best pencil grasp) to then using a refined pincer grasp (thumb and index finger).  Through normal every day play opportunities, such as those listed below, babies will go through this sequence naturally.  Coloring with crayons comes before writing and for coloring children typically begin with a whole fist grasp, thumb side up and progress to a whole fist grasp that's rotated so the thumb is down.  The best grasp for handwriting is with the crayon or pencil tip between the thumb and two or three fingers with the thumb on the writing utensil and not wrapped around the fingers.  The space between the thumb and first finger should also be open and not closed.  Children often need assistance with using the right grasp.  To encourage a tripod pencil grasp try giving your young child crayons that are snapped in half to color with.  If your child is close to 2 years old and still coloring with a whole fist grasp, then switch the crayon into a tripod grasp in their hands. 
To continue to develop fine motor skills use the age appropriate activities listed below and more complex skills will develop naturally.

Activities to support the development of fine motor skills (skip to the section that corresponds with your child’s age):

Babies:
1. LOTS of time spent on the tummy!!! I really can’t stress this enough!

2. Even before a baby can reach for and pick up his own toy, he can hold something in his hand, so around 3 months of age, start placing small baby toys in your baby’s hand for him to explore (thin, cylindrical or thin plush toys are easiest for their little hands to grasp).

3. Play hand games. Even if your baby can’t bring her hands together yet, play clapping and peek a boo games with her by modeling it for her and then moving her hands. Over time she will gain the skills to do it on her own. Being able to bring the hands together to clap then opens up the ability to bring the hands together to hold a toy (this is also when thumb sucking becomes a lot easier for babies and easier for parents who get tired of dealing with the pacifier).

4. Encourage crawling on hands and knees!!! I know that some pediatricians don’t think that crawling on hands and knees (also known as creeping) is necessary for walking, and it’s not, but it is extremely important for a lot of other developmental skills – like building strength and endurance in the muscles of the neck, shoulders, torso and hands needed for fine motor skills (especially handwriting) and gross motor skills; it also plays an important role in brain development called ‘lateralization of the two hemispheres’ which is important for a great number of things (including reading and writing), but I’ll save that for another post. If you see your child not lifting their belly off the ground to crawl on hands and knees, combat crawling in a strange way, combat crawling past 9 or 10 months, or trying to skip crawling on hands and knees and go to walking – then intervening to get your child up on hands and knees would be really beneficial to their development. Consulting with a pediatric occupational therapist can be helpful if you have any concerns.

5. Encourage self feeding as soon as you introduce cheerios, Gerber Puffs, or other small finger foods. Babies will initially rake the food with the whole hand to pick it up, but over time and with plenty of practice, they refine this skill to using a tripod (thumb and first two fingers) and then a pincer grasp (the thumb and index finger) which are important for later skills like writing, tying shoes, etc.

Toddlers:
1. Playing in textures: finger paint, sand, water play (in the sink, bathtub, large bucket, kiddy pool- use squeezy toys and squirt bottles for finger and palm strength), dried beans (hide small objects in the beans for your child to pick out), play dough (roll snakes and balls, pinch of pieces, hide things in the dough, etc), and the list goes on. Get creative and please don’t shy away from these activities because they are messy – kids need to get messy. Lay down newspaper, beach towels, or a tarp; do activities in the bathtub; take it outside and hose down when done – whatever you have to do to let your kids partake in fun, messy, activities.

2. Crayons, stamps, and paint: most children will follow a typical grasp pattern when using writing tools (and please start with crayons instead of markers); they will go from grasping the whole thing in their hand, thumb side up to grasping with the whole hand and thumb down to (hopefully) a tripod or quadrupod (three or four finger) grasp with the thumb down and not wrapped around the fingers, which is the optimal grasp for writing. Anything deviating from a tripod or quadrupod grasp involves writing with the hand and/or arm instead of the fingers and will cause the writer more work and fatigue. Getting the grasp right early on is vital because changing a bad grasp on a school age child is difficult; having good upper body strength to begin with is key.

To encourage the development of a correct handwriting grasp, give toddlers fat crayons or regular crayons that have been broken in half or knob crayons to color with. Model how to color and draw for your child – they are not born knowing how to do this and need your help – plus it’s a fun thing to do together. Small knob stamps are fun to play with and get the fingers in a tripod position. Painting on an easel is also fun and requires big arm movements which help to build or maintain the strength in the arms and shoulders.

3. Puzzles: Start with knob puzzles and graduate to peg puzzles and cut out puzzles as your child is ready. Moving in this order follows the natural pattern of grasp development. Puzzles (and shape sorters) are also great for working on visual processing skills.

4. Piggy bank: This requires adult supervision as it involves a choking hazard, but picking up coins and putting them in a piggy bank is something that little kids love to do and is great for improving their pincer grasp, fine motor control, and visual processing skills.

5. Use an empty food container with a plastic lid (like cool-whip or oatmeal) to create a toy. Cut different size holes in the lid. Cut different size pieces of foam and have your child push the foam through the holes. Also use materials such as cotton balls, pom poms, washcloth, etc. to push through the holes.

Pre-school and School-age:
1. Play dough, modeling clay, silly putty and other types of play materials with some type of resistance. Use cookie cutters, rolling pins, scissors, and other objects to play with the materials; hide pennies, beans, buttons, etc in it and have your child pick them out with their finger tips. To strengthen muscles for handwriting and pencil grasp, have your child tuck the fourth and fifth fingers of their dominant hand into their palm and use only their first three fingers (including thumb) to form a ball of clay, play dough, or silly putty into a cube, continuing to turn it around and push on the sides until a perfect cube is formed.

2. Use a block of Styrofoam and push 10-20 golf tees into the styrofoam (push all the way to heads of the tees until they’re firmly in) for your child to pull out. This works on strengthening the fingers and palm for handwriting and proper pencil grasp.

3. Cooking: let your child assist with cooking tasks, such as stirring and mixing, opening packages or screw top containers, measuring and pouring. This works on fine motor skills and bilateral coordination. 

4. Play with Legos. Legos are tiny and involve a lot of fine motor coordination and strength to pull apart and put together. Many you g children have difficulty playing with Legos on their own at first. The process of thinking of something to build and then planning out how to build it is difficult. Spend time with your child playing with Legos and teaching him or her how to build with them; plus it’s a great way to spend quality time together.

5. Look for games that involve small parts and pieces that need to be manipulated by fingers or hands. Examples: Connect 4, Checkers, Mancala, Tricky Fingers, Fishing game, Monkeys in a Barrel, etc.

6. Crafts: Use scissors, glue, glue sticks, folding paper, coloring, painting, and other materials to create fun art projects. Cut pictures and words out of magazines to create collages. Look up art projects on the internet to do with your child. Remember that children need to be taught how to color, cut, use glue, etc and it is important to teach them how to use them appropriately from the beginning. Color in coloring books and do color by number.

7. Mazes and connect the dots: You can buy books with age appropriate mazes for your child to do, or you can draw some. Mazes and connect the dot games are useful for developing more controlled line drawing, which is important for handwriting and drawing.

8. Gross motor games that work on fine motor strength: Wheelbarrow walking, crab walking, crawling, monkey bars, zip line, climbing on rock climbing walls, etc all help to build strength in the muscles that are also necessary for fine motor skills, arm strength, and upper body strength for handwriting and good desk posture. To make it fun, have wheelbarrow walking or crab walking races, wheelbarrow walk to pick up pieces of candy laid out in a trail or pick up and place scattered puzzle pieces. Play crab soccer. Play on the playground.

9. Puzzles and parquetry: Play with simple to complex age appropriate jigsaw puzzles and parquetry designs.

10.  Switch things up during mealtimes and use toothpicks, chopsticks (they do make chopsticks for kids), or tongs to eat food.  All of these utensils work on grasp, hand strength, coordination, and control.

This is just a start.  Be creative and look for other games and activities to build strength and coordination.  Have fun!

Homemade

Taking a back to basics approach to raising children, or life in general, can involve many different things. One of these things that I haven’t discussed on this blog yet is making things by hand at home: food, clothes, crafts, gardens, maybe even carpentry for the more skillful. Whatever it is, the basic premise behind it is taking care of basic needs by making the end product instead of buying it. As little as several decades ago in our own country (and currently in other cultures around the world) making things by hand was a necessity instead of a hobby. Today we have the luxury of stores and the internet to meet all of our material demands and so the passing down of skills to make products by hand has started to die out along with the value that homemade goods once had.

I feel like these days the word “homemade” sometimes gets a bad rap. It brings to mind art projects made by small children serving as Christmas gifts, ugly baby booties crocheted by an elderly relative, and gifted baked items that you think twice about before eating. There’s a sort of mentality attached that being homemade is somehow inferior to something that has been mass produced and store bought. For others, like me, the mention of the word ‘homemade’ conjures up a whole different set of images that are more associated with comfort, quality, and great care taken by those doing the making. I was raised by a mother who was (and still is) skilled at many crafts. When I was young she knit sweaters, hats, and mittens for my sister and me (which my children now have the benefit of wearing); she sewed clothes for us and smaller versions so that we could coordinate with our dolls; she was also known to weave baskets, stencil, and needle point back then. She also made many of our common food staples from scratch on a regular basis: bread, soups, jams and other canned items, snacks, desserts, and of course all of our meals. I have aunts and a great aunt who are also very talented at these and other skills. They are all wonderful role models of what homemade really means. And I am so jealous of the talents they possess and so I am in the process of slowly trying to increase my own abilities in these areas.

I know, taking a more ‘homemade’ approach sounds silly, right? Why would anyone in this modern era with malls and Amazon at their immediate disposal want to take the time to make something they didn’t have to? Well, it’s certainly not for everyone, but there are several reasons why being a little more ‘homemade’ has its benefits.

For one, as a modern industrialized society we are quickly losing the basic skills of survival and creativity that our culture was built on. How many women in their thirties and younger know how to knit and sew or bake from scratch? How many men in the same age group know how to do any type of carpentry or fix their own car? How many people know how to grow a vegetable garden? To the younger generations, these skills seem like a tradition lost to the ages and unnecessary since we can buy everything we need. But, there is a sense of pride and accomplishment, of being self-sufficient, that comes with being able to create something with one’s own two hands; a feeling that can’t be recreated by watching TV or playing a video game. Our kids and teens these days won’t develop an appreciation for making things by hand and they can’t learn these age old skills to do it themselves unless someone takes the time to teach them. The passing down of this knowledge now falls on the responsibility of family members as programs like home economics and shop class are being deleted from schools at a rapid rate. My mother took a lot of pride in the things she made for us and to this day I treasure the items I still have. My daughter is now benefitting from the adorable wool sweaters and doll clothes that I once used. Although my mother taught me many of these skills along the way, I didn’t have much use for them before and now I find myself with a renewed interest, not only so that I can make things for my family, but also so that I can pass these skills on to my own children some day. It also feels really good to create a finished product with my own two hands that can be enjoyed by others, whether that be homemade bread, soup from scratch, homegrown vegetables, or clothes for my kids.

I think that as a modern culture our country has lost its value for things made by hand because of the disconnect between the product and the creator. We want everything cheap and quickly and don’t think twice about where it is made or who makes it – I am guilty of this as well! Another benefit of teaching kids the skills to create on their own is that it provides children with an understanding of how things are made and where they come from. When they do it themselves or a part of the process they learn to value the product for the time and hard work that went into making it. This sense of value then projects to things that other’s have made by hand. It also translates the old adage of “a job worth doing is worth doing well” in real terms when the product being made is for oneself or a gift for someone else, and ultimately promotes a good work ethic.

Learning a new skill or craft is also good for the old attention span without the distraction of entertainment technology - something that kids today could do with a little more of. When the project being worked on has an end product with some meaning (food to eat, a gift, pride for one’s accomplishment, anything….) then there is motivation to complete the task. When there is motivation to stick with something to get the end product then the time spent focusing one’s attention is increased. Kids today have attention spans far shorter than those of their parents when they were kids, and this has a lot to do with the high-speed technology that kids today spend so much time engaged with. But turning the TV or the computer off and engaging in activities that sustain active brain power on one thing for a while helps to improve the attention span – but only if this happens on a regular basis! If the activity also involves physical action (like gardening or building) then it’s a great way to get the body moving; even baking bread and kneading dough involves more movement than lying on the couch watching TV (and actually is a good activity for young kids to do because it builds strength in the hands and arms, which is needed for handwriting, and gives them a good sensory experience).

Engaging in the process of making or fixing something also requires and promotes the development of creative problem solving – a skill that does not get the chance to develop when kids spend too much of their time involved with entertainment technology that does all the thinking for them. Creative problem solving is really a very important skill, not only for excelling in academics and occupations, but also for everyday life.

And another great thing about teaching your children how to make things by hand is that it gets the whole family involved in homemade projects and promotes time spent together, talking, laughing, and making memories without the TV on. It forces you to slow down and enjoy each other’s company. And in the end you have something to show for your efforts and to be proud of!

Well, there you have it – a few reasons to get creative at home and involve the kids.

Reflections on my own attempts at balancing technology

Looking back, I think I have always approached raising my children in a low-tech manner, trying to re-create the comfort of how I was raised, even since the birth of my first born in 2007. It’s just that this past year I actually put a name to it when I realized that my philosophy isn’t exactly in sync with the rest of the modern culture. It wasn’t entirely obvious at first because many of my friends feel the same way and automatically raise their children based on this simple philosophy. But the more encounters I have with the rest of the population, the more daycare and educational programs I come across, and the more I read about the current state of our youth growing up addicted to high-speed technology, the more I see that the masses have given in to convenience, excess, and instant gratification and unfortunately it has become the rule, not the exception. Apparently my philosophies are the exception and I find myself giving explanations, excuses even, for why my children watch very little TV (in fact no TV at all up until recently, but more on that later) because it seems like such a shock to many parents.

Really, my main agenda, when it comes to how technology is used by my children, is creating a balance where it is used in moderation so as to give them experience without it ruling their lives. So far, I feel like I have found a good balance. Up until recently we had the TV off when the kids were awake, mostly because my son was too young to watch it and my daughter had shown some very undesirable behavior problems when the TV had been a regular habit. Having the TV off actually worked incredibly well for us and, after a brief transition, my children didn’t even miss it. We even downgraded our cable package because we weren’t using most channels. We added DVR, which has been very useful because my husband and I can watch our own programs when it’s convenient for us and we can now control what our daughter watches during her screen time and not just have to play what is on at that time. Which leads me to the recent changes we have made in our screen time policy.

This November my three year old daughter dropped her nap and ever since has been watching an hour of TV a day in the afternoon while my 21 month old son is napping (he only sneaks in a few minutes of TV if he wakes up and my daughter is just finishing her show). I have to admit that part of the decision to put the TV back on for my daughter was based on me being able to have some time to get things done without her underfoot all afternoon, but I also didn’t think it necessary to continue to completely deprive her of screen time. The routine, so far, is that for the first hour while her brother is sleeping we read for a little while and then she plays alone or hangs out with me while I do some things around the house. In the second hour she may watch an hour of sesame street (which I DVR – a piece of technology that certainly has come in handy) or something else I’ve deemed appropriate for her, but ONLY if she has had good behavior during the day. She has to EARN her one hour of screen time. But it is one hour only and then she may has her afternoon snack when the show is over. She is not allowed to eat while watching the show and my reasons for that have to do with the fact that she would want more food once the show was over anyway (the eating thing is a whole other story). There has been some behavior associated with bringing the TV back into her life. She has her moments where she whines for more, but as time goes on and I stick to this rule of only 1 hour of TV I get less and less of the whining. It’s only when I have allowed her to watch more (like when I thought I was giving her a special treat of watching short children’s Christmas movies back to back over the holidays) that she starts all over again with her attempts to keep the TV going. I can see how the addiction starts so easily! But this reorganization of TV use seems to be going fine for everyone, as long as I stick to the 1 hour rule, and it is actually a really great tool for motivating my daughter to have good behavior!

So, although the balance for my children is under control, my biggest problem in this technology tug of war is myself! I do not reject technology for everyone (mostly just for my kids at this point in their lives) and I even use many forms of technology everyday myself.  The problem is that lately I have not been applying the same principles of moderation to myself when it comes to my phone and my computer.  I have to find a way to ‘unplug’ more often; I think it will help me to feel more balanced in my own life and possibly give me more time in my day. My iphone is most frequently the culprit. It is just too easy to pick up and check my email, facebook, the weather report, a website…. Far too often I find myself telling my kids “just a minute, I have to finish this email first” when they are requesting my attention (which makes me feel horrible, yet I still finish the email). Does this sound familiar to anyone?
I try to do most of my computer work at night or when my daughter is watching her 1 hour of TV and my son is sleeping, but somehow I never get everything accomplished because EVERYTHING seems to require a computer these days: communication with friends and colleagues, shopping, paying bills, getting information/directions, organizing photos, and not to mention paperwork for my job. Many of these computer tasks are unavoidable, and like I said, can be accomplished when my kids are asleep. It’s the iphone dependency that is unnecessary and which I really need to break. I even find myself wanting to check it while sitting at stop lights (which, by the way, is now illegal in Georgia). It’s like my brain constantly needs entertainment. I can’t just be alone with my thoughts or enjoy the radio – I need multiple forms of stimuli feeding my brain in order to feel fulfilled. If I have evolved into an iphone addict so easily, then it worries me that my children could very easily get sucked into the obsessive world of technology too, before they’ve had a chance to fully develop all of their developmental and intellectual skills naturally. And, of course I am my children’s most influential role model at this point, so I know that I need to set a good example for them. If I don't teach them how to use technology in a responsible way and in moderation, then who will?

It’s not going to be easy, but I am officially going to try to break my iphone addiction by checking it less frequently, keeping it zipped up in my purse while driving, and keeping it out of close proximity so as not to be tempted to use it when I am engaged with my children – in fact, it will probably promote more quality interactions with my children because I won’t be so distracted. I’ll keep you posted on how this new transition progresses!